So... How Come Nobody Ever Told Me?

I recently received an interesting e-mail that was all about the amazing benefits of dryer sheets. Apparently they are the best thing since sliced bread and applesauce, so how come nobody ever told me? I've always thought that dryer sheets were only for sticking in the dryer (when you remember) and then falling out as you retrieve your clothes only to end up on your bathroom floor to get stepped on or stuck in your pants to give you a nice surprise when you put them on! Little did I know that I should be using dryer sheets in every room of my house, my car, in my clothes (on purpose), in the yard, and in my sink!


Anyway, I'm not sure how many of these I actually believe, but I think I'm going to try a bunch out just to see. (I still think this might be a conspiracy from the Bounce company to sell more dryer sheets, but oh well). Have you tried any? What works and doesn't work for you?

1. It will chase ants away when you lay a sheet near them. It also repels mice. (Yeah right! I tried this with the nasty ants in our kitchen yesterday and they walked all over it... the best thing was to spray the little buggers.)

2. Spread sheets around foundation areas, or in trailers, or cars that are sitting and it keeps mice from entering your vehicle. (Can't say I've ever had mice in my car...)

3. It takes the odor out of old books and photo albums. (Mmm... I love the smell of old books!)

4. It repels mosquitoes. Keep a sheet in your pocket or belt loop. (I tried this, and I'm not sure if it worked since I still got bit, but I think I got bit less than I would have otherwise).

5. Eliminate static electricity from your tv or computer screen. (well, it eliminated the dust on my tv, I'm not sure about the static)

6. Clean shower doors with a sheet to dissolve soap scum. (I have a shower curtain, will that work?)

7. Put a sheet in your vacuum cleaner. (I assume that means the bag- I'll be trying this since our vacuum smells like vomit- don't ask because I don't know why!)

8. Freshen your car by putting a sheet under you car seat. (Ok, I can see how that would work- I'll try as soon as I remember to bring a dryer sheet to the ar).

9. Put a sheet in your luggage before storing to prevent musty suitcases.

10. Clean baked-on foods from a cooking pan. Put a sheet in a pan, fill with water, let sit overnight, and sponge clean. The anti-static agent apparently weakens the bond between food and the pan. (Hmm... I've found that DISH SOAP does the same thing, but what do I know).

11. Put a sheet in your pocket to keep bees/yellow jackets away.

12. Deodorize shoes or sneakers by placing a sheet in them overnight. (Worth a try for any stinky shoe).

13. Wipe up sawdust from drilling or sand papering. A used sheet of Bounce will collect sawdust like a tack cloth. (next time I get out the drill I'll let you know)

14. Collect cat hair. Rubbing the area with a sheet will magnetically attract all the loose hair. (Getting rid of the cat can work too...)

Well, there are more, but you get the idea. If you happen to try any out let me know. Maybe I'm too cynical for my own good, but maybe I just feel silly for actually throwing away these magical little dryer sheets.

Dryer Sheets, Bananas, and Mosquitos

The state bird in my state is the mosquito (or at least it seems like it is). We can't even go outside right now without being swarmed and attacked. The other day I got 5 bites just going from my front door to my car, and these are not ordinary bites either- some are as big as a nickel! I feel trapped in my house by these little vile vermin and don't know how to protect myself and my family from the little vampires. Are we or are we not a more intelligent species?! We, the human race, who have pushed into extinction so many species on the planet are being trapped inside by a little bug! There's got to be something we can do- someone out there who has spent their life in an endless battle with mosquitoes and knows how to help us kill in greater numbers.

Here is what I've tried when it comes to keeping the bugs off of me:
Dryer Sheets- I've been told that if you keep a dryer sheet in your clothes then the buggers will stay away... hmm... well, I don't know how well it worked since there will still a lot of mosquitoes flying around. If it reduces the number from 5,000 to 2,500 then I don't know how well that really helped.
Bug Spray/Repellent- I hate spraying on noxious chemicals all over my body, I hate the feel of it, and I hate the smell of it. With all the pain it takes to use this stuff- it does seem to help. After a whole can, the bugs around me went from giant swarm to mild nuisance.
Bananas- I've also been told that if I eat bananas then mosquitoes won't find my blood so enticing. I don't know if this has helped either since I still have 12 bites on me right now.

Here is what I've tried when it comes to relieving the horrible pain of the bites:
Banana Peels- I was also told that if you rub a banana peel on your bite then it will help the itch and pain. It felt really good while I was applying it, but didn't help in the least with the pain and itch afterward.
Itch Ointment- I put this on ever bite I had and they still became more swollen the next day and the itch was very very mildly diminished.
Hand Sanitizer with Alcohol- This supposedly kills the parts of the bites that have the poison in them and relieves the itch. It helped slightly, but I had to keep putting it on over and over.

What have you tried that has worked or hasn't worked? Is there some random Grandmother's remedy that will cure my itch or keep the little buggers off of me and my family? What products do you like and use and what should I try? I've gotten to the point where natural remedy or chemical overload will have to do- I'm so sick of being a prisoner in my own house. Help me!